Oh Really?

"Be kind and gentle to your children, both in private and in public." The Upanishads

"To generate true love, you need to know how it differs from attachment." Dalai Lama

The person who was complaining about Harry Potter being evil because kids dressed up in costumes at the book selling had a new complaint today. She was highly offended that a celebrity version of Wheel of Fortune had someone donating money to stop gay teenage boys from committing suicide. Her contention was that people choose to be gay and that it is a sin.

Yeah right people really choose to be a part of a minority that is reviled, hated, spit upon, discriminated against, and often killed because of what they are. Sure. This woman calls herself a Christian? Did she miss the lesson from Christ about loving your neighbor?

I have a real problem with bigots of any kind using the word “sin.” Maybe they should take the mote out of their own eye before they start preaching. As far as I'm concerned the biggest sin of all is hating your fellow man for any reason whether it is race, religion, sex, sexual orientation, politics, or whatever. If we are all made in God's image then all of us, no matter what, has God in them and when you hate a person for whatever reason you hate God. Remember Christ said “love thy neighbor as thyself” and he put no qualifiers on it.

The complainer didn't give the name of the celebrity who wanted to help prevent teenage suicides but whoever you are thank you for caring. It is hard enough being a teenager without having to face the fact that you are different from others by being gay. Teenage suicide is a very tragic thing and anything that can be done to stop it is worthwhile. I wonder if this person would feel different if her own son were gay or would she be one of those people who turns their own child out into the cold because of something they have no control over?

I have had many gay friends over the years and I treasure their friendship. They have been some of the most decent people I have ever met and in many ways were better Christians then the so called Christians spewing out hatred. Love thy neighbor as thyself are words to live by.

The picture is called Guardian of Childhood and may all children be safe and loved regardless of their sexual orientation.

The real counter is 5754.

Football Memories

 

"When the consciousness is kept on God, you will have no fears; every obstacle will then be overcome by courage and faith." Paramahansa Yogananda

"Every individual has a universal responsibility to shape institutions to serve human needs." Dalai Lama

I was the only girl among four brothers with a sports nut for a Dad. Fortunately for Dad I was a real tomboy and he could count on me to play sports with him. He taught me how to play baseball and softball. My absolute favorite sport however was football. Dad taught me how to throw one heck of a pass. To this day I can play a mean game of quarterback.

I love football. Sunday afternoon was spent watching the Oakland Raiders play. I can still see John Madden running up and down the sidelines yelling to and at his team and the officials. During the 80s however my team was the San Francisco 49ers with Joe Montana as quarterback. One of my prize possessions is my autographed picture of Joe. It did not get put into storage and is hanging on the wall where I type on the computer. I often look at it and smile.

One of my fondest football memories was when I was living in Denver and putting up with obnoxious Bronco fans. They were playing against Montana and were ahead by 10 points when the 2 minute warning sounded. They were so sure they had it in the bag. Two minutes, heck that is nothing to Joe you might as well give him an eternity. He took those two minutes and scored two touchdowns. I didn't have to say a word at work the next day my grin said it all.

The genius behind the 49ers winning era was a quiet, soft spoken man named Bill Walsh. He was an inspiration to his team and all who knew him. When they talk of the West Coast Offense they often forget sometimes that the West Coast Offense has a name. It is called Bill Walsh. He never railed against sports casters who ignored his contributions to the game. Three Super Bowl rings more then made up for it. Above all Bill Walsh was a teacher. Give him a blackboard and a piece of chalk and he could teach you anything you wanted to know about the game.

I'll always think of Bill Walsh in conjunction with Joe Montana. Joe said, "For me personally, outside of my dad he was probably the most influential person in my life. I am going to miss him."

In addition to his influence on football offense Bill Walsh was instrumental in opening coaching up to minorities. It no longer was a lily white world. After retiring he still kept up his interest in education and charity work. He was a quiet genius who made this a better place to be in. For this football loving lady his death is a sad occasion. Thanks coach for all that you have done for a game I love and for all the good that you have left behind. It isn't only the football world who owes you a debt. Anyone who wants to know the true meaning of greatness has only to follow your gentlemanly example to know how to make the world a better place.

The picture is called Score.

The real counter is 5743.

Sultry Sunday

It has been warm and humid with threats of thunderstorms coming in. Definitely not my favorite weather. One of the major problems with weather like this is that it freaks the cats out and I get very little sleep between the two of them. Merlin especially is a big baby.

I got the shopping done today for Mom and myself. Other then that it has pretty much been a slow Sunday with not a whole lot going on.

I did get everything copied to file a complaint against the hospital for charging for services that were never performed. It is absolutely ridiculous that they expect me to pay $60.00 for a doctor who stood three feet away, never looked at the injuries, prescribed a pain medicine when no pharmacies were open, and when told I was worried about one of the puncture wounds replied "oh it is probably infected" and walked out. Can we say Medical Malpractice? Yes we can!

I have been playing Myst like crazy and having a ball. I am having to look at some of the hints usually after the third or fourth dozen time I've been at the same place. Getting dizzy going around in circles. I have been able to figure out a good deal by myself though which makes me happy.

Another thing that makes me happy is my new picture. It is called Sailing Into the Sunset. I love the ocean and would really rather be by the seashore then landlocked where I am at. My ideal place would be mountains and a seashore since I love them both.

The real counter is 5737.

Soggy Saturday

"Throwing away Zen mind is correct Zen mind. Only keep the question, ‘What is the best way of helping other people?’” Seung Sahn

"There is no doubt about the increase in our material progress and technology, but somehow this is not sufficient, as we have not yet succeeded in bringing about peace and happiness or in overcoming suffering." Dalai Lama

I managed to pull myself away from Myst long enough to work on a new art piece on the new computer which has been named Harvey. I am one of those people who enjoy naming inanimate objects. All of my cars have had names. My current car is a Honda named Amelia Peabody after the feisty character of the same name in Elizabeth Peter's wonderful mysteries. My other computer is named Marvin after Marvin the Martian another favorite of mine. Harvey got his name from the Jimmy Stewart movie and play of the same name. The original Harvey is a 6 foot 3 1/2 inch invisible rabbit who is actually a mischievous pooka. It seemed like a good name for a computer that will find itself doing a lot of fantasy art work.

I am obviously enjoying Myst although I am finding I need to get some hints before I can get out of some of the spots I find myself in. I did manage to make it through the Stoneboat Age and am now in Channelwood. I'm going around in circles at the moment and am trying to get the stupid elevator to work.

After a horrible day I kicked back last night and watched Doctor Who. It was a Dalek story that will conclude next week. I have to give credit to British actors they do manage to do decent American accents. They say your favorite Doctor is the one you grew up with which in my case would be Tom Baker. I loved his Doctor along with Peter Davison's but I must admit I have been totally won over by the current Doctor, David Tennant. He showed some amazing acting last night.

I know that my love of science fiction and fantasy comes in part from a desire to escape from the real world occasionally. Everyone needs a safety valve and a place to get away from it all once in a while. As long as I continue to deal with the real world I see no problem with enjoying science fiction and fantasy. They present new and different worlds; worlds that aren't always better but they are always fascinating. It is a world where Geeks such as myself can meet other Geeks with the same interests. It is a world that mundanes just don't understand. A person was complaining that Harry Potter was evil because kids were in costume waiting to buy the new book. She does not understand that costuming is a big part of the American science fiction society. It is one of the things that we enjoy doing. There is nothing evil about it. She hasn't read the books and doesn't know that the stories are a lesson in good and evil. There is something to be learned there. In her closed mind however she hears the word magic and assumes that it is all evil. Some people have not matured and are still in the Medieval mindset of burning witches at the stake. Salem is still with us.

The picture is called Attack and the new program gives me a chance to do my black unicorn General Brand fighting a rogue dragon.

The real counter is 5730.

Being a Doodle

"There's no shop that sells kindness; you must build it within. You can transplant hearts, but you cannot transplant a warm heart." Dalai Lama

One of the biggest hearts I know of beats within a 8 1/2 pound cat named Pixie. Pixie is all affection and love and she has added time to my mother's life by being so sweet and loving towards Mom. She will sleep with Mom and climb on her lap. It is as if she recognizes that Mom needs her. She is affectionate with me too but Mom is her special person.

Pixie is almost always in a good mood. She fights with my cat Merlin occasionally but for the most part they get along okay. Merlin doesn't like her but that doesn't phase Pixie one little bit.

When we were still debating on what to name the cat Mom was calling her Snickerdoodle after the cookie but my brother decided that Pixie was a better name for her. The Doodle part stuck however and we call her Pixiedoodle on occasion.

I have decided that being a Doodle isn't a bad thing. Pixie is loving and sweet and funny. She is loyal to her people. She has an unbridled curiosity about everything. She isn't judgmental and accepts everybody for what they are. She is a very intelligent animal. She never stresses out. She is never angry.

We could learn a lot from a cat like Pixie. Maybe we should all strive to bring a little "doodle" into our lives.

The real counter is 5712.

What A Wednesday

"There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; my philosophy is kindness." Dalai Lama

I really wish I could achieve the serenity that the Dalai Lama has attained. Sometimes I feel my life is mostly chaos. I came home and played Myst for quite a while. It is stimulating and fun. I should go work on art more then I have but I'm having too much fun with the game. I think everyone needs a distraction from real life once in a while in order to cope.

After dinner I may work on a new idea I have for a picture and see what happens. In the meantime I'm going to take it as easy as I can and try and relax after another stressful day.

The picture is called Chariots of Fire and shows how my wrist is feeling with all the posting I've been doing.

The real counter is 5708.

Terrible Tuesday

"I am absolutely unique, I am me, I am incomparable." Rabindranath Tagore

Since I have to be at work earlier now I am going to be writing in the evenings for a while. I am not an early morning person and getting up earlier just doesn't work.

Stupidity is something I have very little tolerance of. People who are rude as well as stupid really irk me. Women who use their sex to get ahead rather then talent are at the top of my hit list.

I have always prided myself in getting ahead through sheer talent and brains. I don't believe in using my sex to get ahead. I have nothing but contempt for women who do. I would feel the same way about any man who used his sex to get ahead. You have a brain and talent for a reason. You are supposed to use them. I realize that I could have used my looks if I wanted to get ahead but I would never be able to live with myself if I had taken that route. At the end of the day you have to be able to live with yourself. If you can't have pride in who you are and what you have accomplished then how can you expect anyone else to.

I reworked my first effort on the new computer. I like it much better then the old version. Kira, the lady in the picture, is taking the dragon report for her Dad in my stories. Kira earned respect the hard way through sheer talent. A dragon can respect that.

The real counter is 5699.

Must Be Monday

"What we call 'I' is just a swinging door which moves when we inhale and exhale." Shunryu Suzuki

"A learned person will become noble only when he or she has put into practice what has been learnt, instead of mere words." Dalai Lama

One thing education can not teach is common sense. I have dealt with too many people who are intelligent but totally lack common sense. Two of my four brothers are that way and so was my ex. You can have all the book learning in the world but if you lack common sense or the ability to understand how your book learning translates into real life then all the brains in the world won't help you cope with problems that come up.What really needs to be taught in school is a course of how to survive in the real world.

When I was in school they had Home Ed which really taught me nothing. My Dad had already taught me how to sew before I even took the classes. What should have been taught is how to budget, how to balance a checkbook, how to apply for a job, how to write a resume, how to shop for big name items, how to shop for groceries, etc. Instead of teaching us to make a fancy shrimp dish that no one will eat how about teaching nutrition? Where are the courses in coping skills? How do you explain the phases of grief for death. Everyone of us will face the death of loved ones in our lives but no one prepares you for it. Where are the skills in interpersonal relationships taught? Nowhere is the answer.

Book learning is great in its place but there is much more to life then can be learned in a book. Practical things also need to be taught.

The real counter is 5685

Just Playing

I love the DAZ dragons they are so much better then what I have now. I still need to work on the people and find the correct textures but my first effort came out okay. I am having fun with the system and am sure to do a lot of art on the new computer.

That being said I am finding I am spending an enormous amount of time playing Myst and am at the point where I'm going to have to cheat a bit to move on. Come on why do you think there are so many boards with hints and walkabouts out there? Obviously some of us need a little help in the figuring this out department. It is like one of my favorite games Mahjong where you get to shuffle tiles when you know that you can't win with the hand you've got without help.

Games can teach us something important. One thing about the above games is that you learn that sometimes when you are in a rut you do need to ask for help. I have been around the island too many times and I'm spinning my wheels so I asked for some help and this afternoon I may be able to get over to some of the places I need to be in order to move ahead.

In life sometimes you need to ask for help too. One of my favorite magazines is Woman's World because it has uplifting stories in addition to great recipes, diet hints, cake decorating, etc. One section I always read is about angels and how they help us. It is a great thing about having faith because you have the security of knowing that their is a higher power who love you and looks out for you. Where can atheists go for comfort?

The picture is called Reporting and will be worked into my next series of Sean's Stories.

The real counter is 5674.

Twins

 

"If ordinary people know, they are sages; if sages understand, they are ordinary people." Wumen

Well the drama of the last couple of days is over. The phone line problems were caused by a squirrel chewing through the wire which is why we have been without phone service for a couple of days. Dumb squirrel.

My brother got the computer he made up and running however I am going to be going with two computers now. I bought a monitor for the new one and it will be a great machine to do art on. However, you knew there would be a however didn't you? The new machine can not run the art program I use to make touch ups and I haven't been able to get the program my brother brought registered for me to use. So I will bring the art from the new machine to the old and touch it up there. I also found that the games my brother brought won't play on the new machine so I will play them on the old.

The whole situation however does tie in nicely with today's quote. People who are perceived to have power need to realize that the common man also has the seeds of greatness and power in him. All men are important. Men who use and abuse power and let it go to their heads are heading for a fall. Regular people are just as important as the powerful and in some cases even more so. My powerful machine can create the pictures however my less powerful one needs to finish them up. The big and small working together.

In my stories my lead character Sean is physically a very large man. He is strong and resourceful and a warrior. He has a tiny twin sister named Kira who is a Healer. She may not be a strong warrior however she can heal her brother when he gets hurt. We each have talents that benefit others and even the strong need the smaller to help them along because even a pawn can checkmate a king.

The picture is called Twins and shows Sean and Kira at the Rainbow Castle looking out towards the twin moons of Luna and Selene.

The real counter is 5668.

Trying for Thursday

 

"Indulgence in resentment and vengeance will only further increase miseries to oneself and others in this life and in lives to come." Dalai Lama

"To me there is no difference whether president, beggar, or king." Dalai Lama

"Cut down the whole forest of desire, not just one tree only." The Dhammapada

"We have one common goal, and that is the perfection of the human soul, the god within us." Swami Vivekananda

Some powerful quotes today to get us thinking. I have been offline for a couple days while my brother tried to get the new computer working. Unfortunately he can't get power to the motherboard no matter how hard he tried. He replaced the power pack and did everything he could but we can't get enough power to the motherboard to get it up and running. Then AOL has been down. I could not get on yesterday at all but we were having a severe thunderstorm. Today AOL is dropping the connection. Sigh.

The good news is that we were able to find an external DVD drive for the old computer and we can download the goodies that he brought. I will finally have different people, cats, dogs, horses and dragons to work with plus the latest version of Bryce. He also brought one of my favorite games and its two follow-ups Myst, Riven and Myst III Exile. So good old Marvin will keep chugging along although we are pushing him to capacity. If I didn't know better I would think that this computer jinxed the other because he doesn't want me using another one. Hmmm, I hope he isn't turning into Marvin the depressed robot from Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy instead of Marvin the Martian whom he was named for. ;-)

I am taking a couple of days off from work and hopefully before I get my brother to the airport tomorrow afternoon we can get everything up and running on this computer. I am disappointed that the other one won't work but I may take it over to our computer place and see if they can figure out what is wrong or we may ship it back to Eric and he will replace the motherboard and then ship it back. But I still have my old computer and I can still do my work so I can't really complain. Yes it would be nice to have more processing power and speed but I can live with what I have.

The quotes today however bring me back to earth and what is really important. While material goods are nice it isn't what motivates me. It is what is inside of me that counts. The Dalai Lama reminds me that we are all one people no matter what our position is in life. We can be rich or poor, famous or common people but we are still a member of the human race. We all need to wrestle with our own demons and try and conquer them. We need to learn to show respect for all life and all people if there is to be peace in our lives and in this world.

At the end of the day I am still me. I strive to be the best me that I can be. My immediate goal is taking care of Mom with whatever time she has left. I need to do the best I can at my job in spite of the frustrations we face. I have art work that I still want to do. I still want to get my book published. I still have a future to plan.

I am finding that I am achieving more peace inside of me. A few years ago I would have been raging inside that the new computer isn't working. Now I am thankful that I still have this computer. Maybe I am finally become mature. The picture is called By Dawn's Early Light 2. It is a reminder to me that things don't always last. I had to redo the picture because a computer crash wiped out the large version of the original and I had to recreate it.

The real counter is 5655

Murky Monday

"Fundamentally the marksman aims at himself." Zen and the Art of Archery

"We must recognize that all beings want the same thing that we want. This is the way to achieve a true understanding, unfettered by artificial consideration." Dalai Lama

Sometimes it is real hard not to just scream at my older brother. I have been after him to get his own cell phone so Mom isn't deprived of hers when he goes to visit his daughter and grandchildren in North Carolina. You got it after promising he would he has reneged on his promise and he is taking Mom's phone. Mom is letting him because she will be off and doesn't need it. Of course it is the only way she can get hold of me since I have a long distance number on my cell phone so she will be stuck if I am out and an emergency comes up. Of course I will let her use my phone to call her sister. I don't mind lending her mine any time she needs it.

My brother spends literally hundreds of dollars a month on beauty products. He is talking about getting broadband for his DSL at more expense. He is so vain! You know Carly Simon's song "You're So Vain" it is about my brother. He can get everything for himself but can't get his own cell phone even though it deprives his own mother of a safety net. Both Mom and I should have a cell phone with us at all times, Mom because of her heart and me because of my COPD. I'll make sure Mom has mine next week if she works so at least she has a way to call me at home if she has an emergency.

Selfishness and self centeredness really bother me. My ex was that way and I have learned to really despise it. My brother has good points but his vanity and selfishness makes it hard to see the good points. He cleaned the bathroom good last night and wants continuous praise for it ignoring the fact that he is the one that messed the bathroom up in the first place.

When you do something for someone you should do it because you want to help them out. You shouldn't do it because you want to be praised. Giving of yourself should be without ego. You should do it for others and not for praise. You should strive to be selfless not selfish.

The picture is called Guardian of the Fire because I am flaming mad at the moment.

The real counter is 5637.

Sunny Sunday

I'm going to be taking Mom to church in a little bit. The reading this Sunday is on the Good Samaritan and it is one of my favorite readings. I have always believed that we are here on this planet to help others. I'm certainly not rich and likely to never be rich but I do give what I can to various charities. I also like to give my time to help others.

When you help others out you are also helping yourself. There is a feeling you get inside when you can help someone that money can't buy. You feel good about yourself because you have actually gone beyond the self and started thinking about others.

One of the most influential books I have read is I'm OK - You're OK by Thomas Harris. I found his explanation of how a person develops to be very interesting. We go from a child me first stage to a more mature you have needs too stage. Of course some people never get out of the child stage and their goal in life is self gratification. While it is important to be aware of your own needs and happiness it is equally important to think of others and their needs and happiness.

I love doing art work and get a great deal of satisfaction in creating something new. However it is in the sharing of my art that I get the most satisfaction. What use is my art if I am the only person who can see it?

There use to be a series of commercials about Tombstone pizza that asked "what do you want on your tombstone?" I think I want two words. "She cared."

The picture is called Morning Has Broken and is my personal favorite of the pictures that I have done.

The real counter is 5627.

So It's Saturday

 

"All things are linked together through cause and effect. There is no such thing as an accident." Swami Prajnanpad

I've been trying to get things done before my brother comes on Tuesday. I got most of the upstairs cleaned up. My older brother has promised to do the bathroom tomorrow. Since he messed it up I feel it is only fair to have him clean it up. That way tomorrow I can concentrate on getting my nephew's cloak done.

The only other thing I need to do in the next couple of days is back up the new stuff on my current computer so that my brother can install the new computer when he gets here. He is going to try and copy my hard drive over from the current computer but I should still back everything up. Monday my Mom is going to get my car over to our repairman and see if he can find the air conditioner leak. It is getting too hot to not have a working air conditioner.

My Mom is at work and I wish she wasn't. She is having more and more heart problems and I really worry about her. There is too much stress at that place. I'm hoping I can convince her to quit all together soon. She really doesn't need to work and could easily live off her investments from the money her brother left her. She has all the major things done to the house that needed to be done. The only major thing left is replacing the bathroom floor and that won't cost her all that much.

I geeked out last night and watched Doctor Who. It was a kick of an episode and he went back in time and met William Shakespeare. It was a great episode. It cracked me up when I found out that David Tennant who plays the Doctor is also a geek who always loved the show. That means two of my favorite shows are starring geeks, Doctor Who and Heroes with Masi Oka. It is nice to see two of our own become famous.

It isn't easy being different and sometimes you wonder if it is worth it being true to yourself. The answer is that in the long run yes it is. You may never be in with the in crowd but you do find fellow geeks along the way and have fun. Of course you will find that most people don't understand you but that is all right. They are mundanes. ;-)

In honor of one of my favorite shows and because it is really hot the picture is called At the Beach.

The real counter is 5625

Friday the 13th

 

"Slow down and the thing you are chasing will come around and catch you." Zen saying

It is funny how much is made about Friday the 13th. One of my favorite cats, Sasha, was born on a Friday the 13th. So for me the day is a memory of a joyous pet. I don’t tend to be real superstitious any way. It was a typical Friday for me, over worked and under paid. ;-) So unless the television goes on the fritz before I can see Doctor Who tonight it will be a good day.

I have made it through a whole week on my new position and I did a vast majority of the posting for the last two days. It looks like I am doing real good with the new job and the lady who is training me is very pleased. Now if I can get people to stop trying to dump the old responsibilities on me as well. I don't have time to do two full time jobs.

I like the Zen saying for today. I think too often we rush around and try and pursue things and goals and we don't take enough time for ourselves. I know sometimes I feel frantic with lists of things to do. It is going to be a busy weekend because I need to get a couple of things done before my brother leaves to go see my niece and her children. I need to get a cloak made for my nephew. I also need to get the upstairs bathroom cleaned before my other brother comes for a visit. My Mom wants to try and get the new tile for the bathroom floor tomorrow too. It will be a busy weekend.

I plan to take a couple of days off next week when my brother visits. I want him to show me how he uses a couple of new programs that will give me some new figures to use in my art programs. My Mom is taking vacation too so that will be nice.

I am trying to stay more calm then I have been lately. The weather is a little cooler so I do feel like walking. In spite of the hot weather there are still some beautiful flowers out there that I haven't seen before.

The real counter is 5621.

 

Being Me

 

In my book one of my characters complains that it isn't easy being her. Sometimes I feel that way and I know many of my geek friends feel the same way also. It isn't easy being different especially when you are in high school or college and you realize you just aren't like every one else. You aren't in with the in crowd and you don't want to be. What they find interesting you find boring.

Sometimes people will want to be accepted so much that they pretend interest in things that bore them to tears. They will pretend to like movies or music or television that has no interest for them. It is a sure way to make yourself even more miserable then you are.

I was one of those oddballs who always loved school for the learning. I loved theater and found it infinitely more enjoyable then a basketball game. I love science fiction. I would rather watch Doctor Who then Desperate Housewives. I would rather read a good science fiction, fantasy, or mystery book then a romance novel or some of the angst filled stuff that passes for literature these days. Lately I'm finding that the trend to denounce God is at odds with my belief that there is a God.

The older I get the more I realize that I am comfortable in my own skin. I would rather be me then anyone else. I have come to terms with my quirks and habits and if others can't accept them that is not my problem. I believe in giving a honest days work for my employer. That is just the way I am. I'm not there to take long lunches, frequent breaks, drink coffee and gossip. I'm there to work and that is what I do.

This blog is my little world where I can talk about how I feel about things and show my new photos or art work. It is my comfortable little corner. I value those of you who read this blog and thank you for visiting. I am me and the only me I know how to be.

The picture is called Space Oddity.

The real counter is 5611.

Karma

 

"A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it." Rabindranath Tagore

"Ideally one should have a great deal of courage and strength, but not boast or make a big show of it. Then, in times of need, one should rise to the occasion and fight bravely for what is right." Dalai Lama

In Easter religions there is a concept of karma that what we do in this life will reflect on our future lives. In the West we have the saying "what goes around comes around." The Bible puts it as "you reap what you sow."

We are not alone in this world and it is important how we treat others. As the two quotes above teach us there is value in humility and compassion. If in your ego you set yourself above others and have no compassion for anyone else then eventually you will suffer a fall. Life has a way of springing nasty surprises on us.

The real counter is 5604.

Tumultuous Tuesday

 

"Let a Christian follow the precepts of his own faith, let a Hindu and a Jew follow theirs. If they strive long enough, they will ultimately discover God, who runs like a seam under the crusts of rituals and forms." Swami Nikhilananda

I have always been a firm believer in that there is only one God and all the religions in the world are worshiping the same deity but they are seeing him/her from different angles. I feel that a religious war is an oxymoron. There is nothing holy about killing people. There is nothing holy in killing people because they see God differently then you do. One God for everyone is what I believe.

One of the books I got at the bookstore on Sunday was by a Buddhist monk named Thich Nhat Hanh and is called Anger. I have just started it and I am impressed so far. He has a couple of other books I am thinking of getting, one called Living Buddha, Living Christ which talks about how the teachings of Christ and Buddha are not that dissimilar. I am hoping that the book Anger will help me learn to keep my temper under control. It has been a rough few days at work with the new responsibilities plus them expecting me to do much of my old responsibilities at the same time. I am only one person and I'm way overworked now doing work that lazy people don't want to do. I can't do everyone's job. I am extremely frustrated and have been coming home with massive headaches.

Sunday was so nice being able to spend quality time with my mother. It was very relaxing in spite of my doing all the driving and the traffic. I tried to get Mom to pick out some books for herself at the bookstore but she wouldn't do it saying the gift cards were mine. So I ended up getting four books that I thought she would like too. Two of the books are by Dean Koontz and two are Agatha Raisin mysteries. I'm reading one now and I think she will get a kick out of them.

The picture is called The Queen's Garden and comes from my short story series. I felt that Queen Niri with all of her responsibilities and worries had to have a place where she could relax and get away from it all. When I meditate at night and after I have relaxed every part of my body and my mind I try to visualize a tranquil place to be and the picture reflects the scene that I visualize.

The real counter is 5601.

Hapiness Is

Remember the old Peanuts book Happiness is a Warm Puppy? Well yesterday happiness was taking my Mom shopping. It is something we have been talking about doing for ages but somehow she never really felt like going. What was most amazing was that she actually spent some money on herself.

Our shopping started on Saturday when she accompanied me to Wal-Mart where I had an eye exam and she went around the store and found some blouses on sale and got some for herself and a couple for me. We finished up the regular grocery shopping and then I took her to church. She tires easily so we decided to wait until Sunday for the rest of the shopping.

Sunday we drove about 35 miles to the nearest real shopping center that had a JC Penny in it. Mom had a 15% coupon that they sent her for her birthday. She actually got some clothes for herself when she found more things on sale. Mom loves sales. She again bought me a couple of things. We went over to the bookstore where I proceeded to use up my gift cards and finished at Target where I used that gift card up as well.

What made yesterday so special was that it was just the two of us. She couldn't do a lot of walking since she tires easily but we did just enough for her to shop and look around at things. It got her out of the house for a change and the drive wasn't so bad that it bothered her arthritis.

She felt like talking about Dad for a bit and her observations were funny. She mentioned the loveable little quirks my Dad had. She enjoyed the outing and I enjoyed being with her. It was a mother/daughter bonding day.

Sometimes we look in all the wrong places for happiness. The joy on Mom's face when she spotted a bargain is worth more then a plasma screen TV. Just being with someone you love and spending some real time with them is what you need for happiness. Those few hours I spent alone with Mom are priceless. What makes it even more priceless is that she wants to do it again. Now I just need to rack up those points on my Debit card and earn another gift card so off we can go again shopping.

The real counter is 5587

Seriously Sunday

 

Since we only got part of the shopping done yesterday I am waiting for Mom to get up so we can finish today. We did the regular shopping here in town and did church yesterday. I also updated my website with a half dozen new pictures and another close to a dozen photographs. Today we head off for the more fun stuff.

While waiting for Mom to get up I perused the news on line. AOL has revamped their news to give people the chance to write about the news stories they read. They shouldn't have bothered. After reading some of the idiotic comments today I've come to the conclusion that most of the posters on AOL are blithering idiots who like making fools out of themselves.

I read the article on the concerts to promote awareness of the environment. The comments were so outrageous and dumb that I couldn't believe anyone could be that stupid! Comments on going out to buy a gas guzzling truck, and wanting to pollute as much as possible since they weren't going to be here in 100 years, and farting along with the cows, etc. Why do people think that being able to use an anonymous handle gives them the right to be foul mouthed and idiots? They parade their most outrageous and prejudiced ideas and think that absolves them of the responsibility to act like a decent human because they can post anonymously. It still makes you a jerk.

I am noticing more and more anti-religious remarks being made in newsgroups that aren't even on that topic. The newsgroups have gone from being places to discuss topics of mutual interest to foul mouthed rants and bigotry. No one seems to care about common decency. It is making it hard to find any place that is worth reading any more.

The picture is called Earth Day and it is a reminder that we have a beautiful home but we need to take care of it. It is the only home we have.

The real counter is 5582.

Such A Hot Saturday

 

"A person who says, 'I'm enlightened' probably isn't." Baba Ram Dass

It will be in the mid 90s today with humidity to match. If she is up to it I plan to take Mom shopping. I found a mall a few miles away from us that has a JC Penny and a Barnes and Noble plus Target is pretty close by also. She has a gift card for Wal-Mart so we have plenty of options. Now if I can only get her to buy something for herself.

I finished Benjamin Hoff's The Te of Piglet last night. He was in a much more serious mood when he wrote this book then when he did The Tao of Pooh. He is an environmentalist and he worries over how we are treating our planet. It is something that I am also very concerned about. This is the only home we have and we need to take better care of it then we are currently doing.

One of the things I'm going to be looking for is books as I have $40.00 worth of gift cards to Barnes and Noble. It will be a case of trying to find some that Mom would like as well and looking for things that I am interested in. One thing near the top of my list is a Tai Chi DVD for Mom and I to see if it will help our arthritis. I may look for some more books on the Tao Te Ching. I find I am more and more interested in Eastern Philosophy. There is so much turmoil at work and worrying about my Mom's health that I am searching for peace in my life.

Peace seems so hard to find these days. The job is a zoo without the cute animals to make it better. I try to stay calm but I find that the stresses are getting worse and I don't want to have to rely on tranquilizers again to find the peace I need. If I can find the peace through ancient philosophy then I'll try it. There is no reason why a person can't use many different roads towards peace within. I see no conflict with exploring Eastern Philosophy, New Age, and still holding to my belief in God. It is the same God for all of us after all.

The picture is called The Road Less Taken

The real counter is 5577

Happy Birthday Mother

Today is my Mom's 81st birthday. My niece and I are getting together and getting her the Twilight Zone DVDs. She really liked that show.

Mom is getting very frail now and is having problems walking up and down stairs. I really wish I could get her to quit her job at the hospital. It is just too stressful for her. The place is such a zoo and doesn't know what they are doing. I had to be in early yesterday because they have taken me out of patient accounts altogether and put me in cash posting and who knows what else. Of course I'm still expected to keep up with the rest of the stuff I've been doing. Sigh.

We got the last remaining cat over to my boss last night. Mom will miss the outdoor cats but they will be happier out there in the country and we won't have to worry about kittens every year. Now Pixie and Merlin can go back to ruling the roost.

I've been reading The Te of Piglet by Benjamin Hoff. It is more serious then his The Tao of Pooh but still very much worth reading. In this hustle and bustle world of ours we forget sometimes that we are all interconnected. We are not separate from nature and other life. We are all part of each other. We hustle so much for material gain that we neglect the spiritual aspect of our lives and wonder why we aren't happy.

If I get home in time tonight I plan to walk and take some more pictures of flowers. Mother just loves the floral pictures I take and it would be a nice addition to the album she is making of my photographs. It is such a little thing but it makes her so happy. Take a moment today and look at the beauty of nature.

The real counter is 5572.

Happy Fourth of July

 

"There are two types of competitive behavior. One is a sense of competition because you want to be at the top. You create obstacles and harm someone. That competition is negative. But there is a positive kind of competition, which benefits the individual, the competitors, and the economy. Let your competitors also grow, without any sense of harming them." Dalai Lama

The last three nights someone has set off cannon fireworks which has shook the house and scared poor Merlin half to death with Pixie cowering behind him. It looks like the fireworks for tonight may be put on by Mother Nature instead with strong thunderstorms forecast.

My Dad was into genealogy and was very happy when he found that we were related to James Wilson who was one of the signers of the Declaration of Independence. James had a very up and down life but was a fiery orator who strongly believed in independence for the colonies.

I love my country and believe that America is a wonderful place. I don't care for politics however because of all the mud slinging and negativity that takes place. This country was founded on the two party system and we need to remember that during the run of the million candidates for President. In spite of the rhetoric there is a place for conservative Republicans, liberal Democrats and all those in between. Just because a person has a different political view from the one you hold that doesn't make that person anti-American. A good American will speak his or her mind on the issues of the day and if they disagree with the current policy it is all the more important for them to speak up. Disagreeing with a policy is the right of every American. Speaking up is the right of every American. Freedom of Speech is an important right and we need to defend it.

Our government governs at our will, the will of the people who elect them. If they can't or won't listen to what the people want then it is our right as citizens to vote them out of office. Every two years we are voting for some office whether it is our congressman or our president. We need to be involved. We need to tell our candidates and political commentators that we want to hear about the issues not personal attacks. Where do the candidates stand on the things that affect our lives? What are their plans for making things better for us? It is time that we as Americans take back the campaign trail and let those running know that we are tired of the mud slinging. Issues not mud. That should be our rally cry for this fourth of July.

The picture is called Fireworks.

The real counter is 5564.

The Tao of Tuesday

 

I have been reading Benjamin Hoff's The Tao of Pooh which is such a gentle book. It is a sweet way to teach a complicated philosophical concept which those of us in the West have trouble grasping because we are too much in a hurry and too materialistic to enjoy the simplicity of the concepts behind Taoism.

There are a few people in the public eye right now who need to learn a more gentle concept and also learn that they are responsible for themselves. Vivica A. Fox drives while drunk and goes into a tirade against the policeman who arrests her and calls him racist. Issiah Washington screams racism because his contract wasn't renewed. Brittany Spears goes into a rage against her mother for getting her into rehab to face her problems.

Not one of the three people mentioned stops to realize that they are responsible for their own behavior and the consequences of their own action. Racism didn't make Vivica drive while drunk. Racism didn’t cause Issiah to try and choke Patrick Dempsey and call TR a faggot. Lynn wasn't responsible for Brittany out drinking herself senseless and showing herself without underwear.

I get tired of people blaming everybody else for their own faults. We are responsible for our own actions and we need to take responsibility for what we do. Vivica needs to stop drinking and driving. Issiah needs to get real help in controlling his rotten temper. Brittany needs to realize she is a mother and get professional help to learn how to deal with her own problems.

The real counter is 5557

The Meow of Monday

"Why is the river dry? I built a dike across it so that it would serve me and me alone; that is why the river is dry." Rabindranath Tagore

"If you are able to transform adverse situations into factors of the spiritual path, hindrances will become favorable conditions for spiritual practice." Dalai Lama

I'm going to attempt work today and hope the headache doesn't reassert itself full blown. At the moment we are at the dull roar stage and hopefully it will not decide to go into the knock you on your rear end stage. I can't afford to be out since I have no sick leave left and get none until October.

I spent most of the weekend in bed sleeping. Enough heavy duty pain pills and even a migraine will go away for a bit. I did finish hemming and pressing my Mom's pants for her. They go to new scrubs this week and she is so tiny that a good three inches of pants legs had to be trimmed off and rehemmed. She was so grateful that I would do it for her. It was such a simple thing to do and I was more then happy to do so.

We are both off this Wednesday and we may go shopping if she is up to it to get her a computer desk and monitor. My brother will be here in a couple of weeks to set up my new computer and we will move one of her computers downstairs. She hates to spend money on herself but I am going to convince her that she needs to think of herself once in a while.

I was looking at today's quotes and keeping in mind that last night I was reading Benjamin Hoff's The Tao of Pooh. I also have his The Te of Piglet. They are such delightful books and teach a complex subject in a way that anyone can understand. I am fascinated by Eastern philosophy and have readthe Tao Te Ching many times. While it may seem frivolous to explain Taoism via Winnie the Pooh I find that the simplicity of a humble bear is such a change from the ego of certain people.

I started this morning with the meow of Monday and a cat cuddled on either side of me. The picture is called Friends and they are more valuable then gold.

The real counter is 5551

Supernova

"For an instant, I am absent, myself and my problems, my anxieties, my troubles: nothing but this wonder exists." Krishnamurti

I have of course never experienced a supernova. No one can experience it without being blown up in the explosion of course but based on NASA space photographs I imagine this is something like it would appear if you could see it. Waves of gas being thrown off of a bloated star who finally reached the critical mass that leads to its destruction. However even in its death that star is throwing out the material that will in time create new stars and planets. From death unto life.

I have been suffering since Friday with a massive migraine. If you have never experienced one take a look at the picture. That is how your head feels on a migraine. I have been popping pain pills and huddling in a dark room and eventually sleeping the pain off. It is better today but it is still there on the fringes letting me know we aren't pain free.

Yesterday we were able to capture momma cat and both kittens and get them off to my boss’s farm. They will have plenty of space to roam around and the killer raccoon can no longer threaten the baby’s lives. I miss the little monkeys but they are in a good home. We just need to capture Dixie who is momma's sibling and the whole family will be there and together.

I don't know if it is the codeine tablets or not that is doing it but my dreams have been very vivid. The dreams lately have had a theme of having to move. A harbor of change to come. I know that like it or not my Mom's health is failing and I will have to face the change of moving sooner probably then later. We can not afford the house after she goes and we will need to get it and the contents sold as soon as we can. I don't know if my brother plans to stay in this small town or not but I don't. Most likely I will move down to North Carolina to be near my niece and her family. I have a complete household in storage ready to go. I imagine we will go through the things here to kit my brother out in a place of his own. I will help get him set up but I doubt if we will end up living together after Mom goes.

While there is a sadness at the thought of losing Mom there is also a sense of purpose that life goes on and she would want me to live my life the best that I can. I need to be in a better area for arts then I am now if I wish to make it as an artist and writer. She and my Dad both want me to succeed at the writing and the art. I will give it my best shot not only for them but for myself and a thank you to God who gave me the talent.

The real counter is 5546.