Cold Fear

What should have been a good weekend took on the mantle of a nightmare instead. My mother was off this weekend and Saturday I did her shopping as usual. When I got back and put things away she asked me to accompany her to church. During Mass I saw her get into her purse and get a nitroglycerine tablet. I knew she was having sharp chest pains. A few minutes later she got a second tablet. I really started getting scared at that point because she was obviously in an extreme amount of pain. I asked her if I needed to get her home but she wanted to stay until after communion. At that point I got her outside and she asked me to drive because her vision had gotten all blurry. I wanted to take her to the hospital but she refused. I got her home and in bed where she stayed the entire weekend. We cancelled our planned trip to her sister's house because she was still too weak and shaky.

There is nothing that is more frustrating then being in a helpless situation where there is nothing you can do to help someone in distress. All I could do all weekend was to hover near her in case she needed me. I spent the weekend in a state of fear and anxiety over her.

The room where I have the computer is right over Mom's bedroom and I spent the weekend there so I could hear her call if she needed me. I put together a scrapbook of pictures from my niece's wedding for her to look at. I also went though my pictures to see which ones I did not have the models for. I have pictures that I can print off of in most cases but I don't have models for about a dozen of them in case I want to go larger prints. One of the ones I lost completely in the drive crash was "Chicago Winter Dreams" of which only a very small version still exists. That was the one I worked on last night. I have recreated it and like the new version better then the old.