Tolerance

It seems that lately my tolerance level is decreasing and things are starting to bug me. Two of my brothers have messed up and Mom has to bail them out again. This not only puts her out money but it takes a toll on her heart because she worries so much about what will happen to them after she is gone. They may actually have to learn to grow up and take control of their own lives. In reality they will probably turn to me to try and fix things. Sigh.

I subscribe to a couple of newsgroup in topics that interest me. I blew up at a bully in one of them yesterday. I am tired of him following one person around and posting obscene posts at him. I have a good idea who the poster is in real life. He is an arrogant person who refuses to concede that he was in the wrong as much as the person he is persecuting. He refuses to forgive and let the wounds of their battle that took place months ago heal.

Six years of marriage to a person who refused to forgive or forget what he considered slights to him has decreased my tolerance for these type of people. To be human is to err. If we were perfect we would be God. We aren't. We are flawed human beings. To keep churning up anger and hatred towards others destroys the hater. Little by little this hatred is eating away at their humanity and turning the hater into a pathetic shadow of a human. It leaves a shell that is filled with hatred because all good and decent emotions and feelings are driven out to make room for the ever growing hatred. To see a human destroy themselves like that is really sad. It is such a waste of the life that you have been given.

I was thinking of this hatred that destroys when I did the latest Guardian picture. This is “Guardian of Fire.” Fire when it gets out of control will leave a blackened hulk with nothing inside but ashes. Hatred does the same thing.