Circle of Life

As we get ready to head into the Lenten season, New Orleans is celebrating Mardi Gras . Lent will culminate for Christians in Holy Week and Easter. We are also getting ready for Spring although that may still be a few weeks away weather wise. It is a time of death and rebirth.

The cycle of death and rebirth is in many different cultures. In pagan times the seasons were the focus of celebration with the death of the plant world in winter giving way to its rebirth in spring. During Holy Week we commemorate the death of Jesus and his resurrection at Easter. Many Far Eastern religions have as one of their tenants the idea of reincarnation.

There was a time when the idea of New Orleans being able to survive and rebuild enough to do Mardi Gras again seemed like a wild dream. There is still so much to be done to rebuild the city but they are slowly coming back to life. There is a resilience to humans that is really amazing. Somehow in spite of everything we still manage to survive events that by all rights we shouldn't be able to survive.

During the Lenten Season those of us brought up Christian reflect on the man who gave his life to save us from sin. It is a time when we reflect on our own lives and see what we can do to make ourselves worthy of his sacrifice. We also reflect on his resurrection and the promise that when we die we will join him and those who have gone before us. I find great comfort in the thought that I will be able to see my Dad again.

The picture is called "Circle of Life" and was inspired by the Elton John song of the same name.

 

Deja Vu

The troll is back on my newsgroup with more lies and disrupting a thread for an event that benefits a children's hospice. He obviously was warned by his ISP because I reported him last night for violations of their Terms of Service. Today he is all apologetic which he always is after being warned. Again it is more lies.

Why do people lie? I know there were times I lied in my marriage when towards the end I still told my husband I loved him when quite clearly by that time he had destroyed any love I had ever had by his cruelty. Why did I lie? I was at the point in my life I would say anything that would give me a moment's peace.

My ex-husband told numerous lies before, during and after our marriage. He even lied to a Catholic priest. He was a pathological liar and incapable of telling the truth. He lied to make himself look good and everyone else bad but the reality was the opposite of what he wanted. He was the one who looked bad.

Why does the troll on the newsgroup lie? He thinks it gives him power over the others when the opposite is true. We can shut him down and have shut him down in the past. He has this pathological need though to keep posting all over the net and alienate people. He has no power because it doesn't matter what his name is we can tell it is him by the way he posts and looking up where he posts from.

Then there are the "little white lies" telling someone they look good when they don't. We have to weigh the consequences of our answers. If we are truthful and say no then that person's feelings would be hurt. I try to find something about the outfit that works to answer. That is a great color or interesting design or anything that I can say that would make the person feel good. I will tell the "little white lies" to try and keep from hurting someone's feelings.

Lies present a moral dilemma. The Bible say "thou shall not bear false witness" but it also tells us to "love thy neighbor." Is telling someone they look fine when you don't like the outfit false witness or loving thy neighbor? What if it is all they can afford and they are trying to do their best to look good.? Is not hurting their feelings more important then not lying? Was it all right to tell a man I clearly no longer loved that I did when the consequences of  not telling him would have been dangerous to my physical or mental well being? Sometimes life can be very difficult.

The picture is just called "Pig" and was done when we had two trolls plaguing the newsgroup. It was done to work off frustration. Art can be very soothing.

Flight

Have you ever had a dream where you could fly? I have dreams like that frequently. I love the exhilaration those dreams have of being able to soar in the air and fly to anywhere I want. I think one of the things mankind has always wanted was to be able to have the freedom to fly anywhere they dreamed of. Our ultimate dreams of flights are into space and visiting those celestial bodies we see in our sky.

There are a lot of sayings and references to flying in our everyday world. Someone is higher then a kite. Fly away. Soaring. On Eagle's Wings. On the wings of a snow white dove. Flying high. Flights of fantasy.

I am flying high today because I'm within a couple of inches all around and between 10 to 15 pounds from my ultimate weight goal. I am getting ready to sew a wedding dress for my niece. I have several new ideas for pictures. I just finished my 14th short story in a series and can now start looking for a publisher. I am happy.

Happiness is an emotion that I associate with flight. It is that soaring feeling you get when you dream of flying. It is one of the reasons that the hero in my short stories is a shapeshifter who can turn into a bird and fly. Sometimes I think we don't allow ourselves enough of that soaring happiness we need in our lives. We dwell too much on the things that get us down and not enough on the things that make us happy.

Our local paper had an article that talked about vacations in the future and that the ultimate trip for regular man would be going into space. I know that has always been a dream of mine. I would love to be able to go into outer space or step foot on the Moon or Mars. I have had a life long love affair with space.

I have always been amused by the saying "it is hard to fly with eagle's when you work with turkeys" because if you use the wings you have you can always soar above the turkeys who refuse to fly.

The picture is called "Flight."

 

 

Nightmare Redeaux

I was looking through one of my folders on my  computer the other evening when I came across an old email from a friend that dated back to when I was married. Reading that was like stepping back in time to find myself in a nightmare that I thought I would never wake up from. I was surprised at how quickly that night came back to me.

My ex-husband went through my computer and found a letter I had written to my parents. He proceeded to wake me up and berate me for criticizing him. He told me I was not allowed to say anything about him to my parents or anyone else without clearing it with him first. This occurred on the same day that I learned that a friend of 25 years was suffering from leukemia. My husband didn't give me one word of concern for my friend. He only snapped that "I obviously didn't know how much he was suffering."

This was the man who during our marriage had been warned by a marriage counselor to stop calling my Dad and trying to turn him against me. He was warned by a priest to stop threatening to call the police on me because "I scared him." This man was over 350 pounds and 6'2" to my 108 pounds and 5'1". I was warned by a psychologist to be careful because he would try and kill me if I left him. I had to move across the country to even feel half way safe.

My friend's email was the first time a person tried to warn me that I was in an abusive marriage. Her being willing to take the chance was the reason that I sought professional help. My doctor told me that there was nothing wrong with me except the fact that I was in an abusive marriage. It started me on the road to freedom.

I would urge everyone to read what the late Ann Landers said about domestic abuse. This article may save your life or the life of someone you care about. http://rf-web.tamu.edu/security/secguide/Eap/Abuse.htm If you see these signs in either your life or the life of someone you care about please do something about it. My friend alerted me to a fact I was afraid to face. Her courage gave me courage to change my life and get away. It was the single most frightening thing I have ever done in my life. If I can do it so can someone else in the same situation and if I can help please let me know.

Big Baby

My cat Merlin is a big boy. He will be eight years old in April and has grown from a little kitten to a huge cat. He is 15 1/2 pounds and when he stands on his back paws he can wrap his front paws around my waist. When I first got him he was only four weeks old and the mother cat had abandoned the litter. Because he never bonded with the mother cat when I got him he immediately decided I was his mother. I have been mothering him ever since.

At the moment my big baby is curled up on the bed. He has a little bit of either a kitty cold or kitty allergies. To look at him though you would think he was dying. He has always been the biggest baby when he doesn't feel good. I think it goes back to when he was a couple months old and almost died from pneumonia. Ever since that time when he feels the slightest bit sick he becomes depressed and droopy.

I have had cats all my life but I have never had a cat that was so dependent as Merlin. He is also very demanding and when I come home from work he wants my undivided attention. I always read before I go to bed and Merlin will stretch out on my legs. I hate to tell him he isn't a little kitty any more and sometimes he does put my knee to sleep.

One of the best things about Merlin though is that he makes my mother laugh. We had told Mom for a long time she needed a pet but she refused to get one. She has one now and most of the time she refers to him as her grandcat but sometimes she slips and refers to him as her cat. As happy as he makes her I'm willing to share the big baby with her.

 

Further Thoughts

I have been thinking about the trial that just ended. There were many moments and thoughts from that trial that upset me. The first came during the jury selection phase of the trial. The doctor, who was the defendant, is Chinese and came over here from Taiwan. He is a humble and quiet man. With the exception of when he testified, he never looked up or at anyone. You could sense the pain he was feeling. During the selection part of the proceedings his lawyer asked the prospective jurors if she could assure her client that we would listen to the evidence and decide without prejudice. One man answered, "No because my daddy fought in World War II against the Japanese and we were taught to hate all Asians." My Dad was in the Pacific during World War II and my brother was in Vietnam and we were not taught to hate. How can a grown man continue to exhibit that sort of hatred towards anyone who was not like himself? I have no doubt that his prejudice extended to blacks, Hispanics, Native Americans, and anyone else who isn't lily white. You are supposed to learn through life and even if in childhood you were taught prejudice that is no reason to carry that prejudice throughout your adult life. The doctor was Chinese. Did that man sleep through history class? The doctor was from a different country, different ethnic background, different history, different traditions. If you asked that man I'm sure he would claim he was a good Christian. I'm sure he passed hatred on to his children and hatred is contrary to Christ's teaching.

Another thing that bothered me was that the plaintiff was on her second attorney. Did her original attorney, who got her a settlement from the hospital, tell her she had no case against the doctor? Did this second attorney come in and tell her, "I can get you a lot of money from the doctor's insurance?" Was she motivated by greed at that point. The way she fidgeted all through the trial indicates to me she wasn't settled in her mind that she was doing the right thing. The attorney struck all of us as an ambulance chaser. He was in it because he could get a big portion of her winnings. The attorney told us in closing that the doctor would just go on as normal. It wouldn't affect him at all. This is a deeply caring doctor and he was devastated by what happened. He immediately apologized to the woman when he found out what happened and visited her frequently in the hospital after the second operation to make sure she was all right. Are those the actions of someone who doesn't care? Of course not. If the doctor had been white would the ambulance chaser still go after him?

The other thing that bothered me was that the plaintiff stacked the jury with all women believing that we would be swayed by emotion. He denigrated our intelligence. Even the judge believed we would find for the plaintiff based on emotion and the fact she was a woman. How very sexist of both of them. I hate it when people think women are incapable of deciding a case on points of law or that women are incapable of logic. I got As when I took logic thank you very much. I may be an artist but I also know how a computer works, can solve a math problem, even know how to program in Basic. I am a smart woman and resent it when people think that I'm incapable of rational thought.

When I got home Thursday I was in a contemplative mood. I reread the Chinese "Tao Te Ching" before I went to bed. I have always been fascinated by Oriental philosophy. It is a calm and accepting way of life. While I appreciate it I probably can't be that accepting. I have a tendency to want to manipulate what ever fate has in store for me. I am a strong woman and try to be without prejudice or hatred. I must admit though that the emotional part of me wanted to smack the potential juror with his bigotry and the plaintiff's ambulance chaser attorney.

The picture is called "The Queen." It is a portrait of Queen Niri, the High Queen of the Elves, from my short story collection. She is a very strong character in the stories and a very important one. Like most beings she can lead with both her heart and her head. In a way she is like me in that respect and I think as a writer I do influence the behavior of my characters based on myself.

 

Sometimes When It Rains

It has been an intense, emotionally draining week. On Monday I appeared at the court as summoned and I was picked to be on a jury. It turned out to be a malpractice suit that a jury of seven women were asked to judge. One lady had a medical emergency in her family and the alternate was named a permanent juror. Six women jurors with a woman as plaintiff against a male physician as defendant. She had a male lawyer. He had a woman.

From the very start it was obvious that the plaintiff's attorney was going to base his appeal solely on emotion. No one could deny that the woman had gone through a horrible experience. During a hysterectomy to remove her female organs, because of cancer, a sponge was left inside her and she contracted a serious infection and had to have more surgery to remove the foreign object. She had an open wound for sixteen months and further complications and further surgery was necessary to fix those problems.

Sounds pretty open and shut doesn't it? The doctor missed a sponge and she got ill because of it. What went wrong with the plaintiff's case? Arrogance on her attorney's part. He assumed that when he manipulated the jury to get all women that he could feed us pure emotion and ignore facts in the case. He gave us emotional family members and video taped depositions by doctors. At no point were we the jury able to ask questions, which is our right under law to do, because their doctors couldn't bother to be there in person. We wanted to ask her second surgeon about the wisdom of leaving a wound open for sixteen months but we couldn't because he was only there on a videotape. It wasn't important enough to bring him out in person.

One of the clearest facts in the case was that the doctor had to depend on the instrument count from the nurse assisting him. The nurse had set up for the surgery and told him that there were 15 sponges to start with. As the surgeon was ready to close he asked for the count of the sponges twice and was told twice that they had fifteen sponges. None were left inside the patient by the count of this nurse. What went wrong? Clearly she either counted wrong to start with or counted wrong at the end.

The defense lawyer appealed to our logical minds. She presented surgeons live that we could ask questions. She took us through an operation with graphics that a surgeon went step by step through, showing where everything is in the body, explaining how they go about the surgery, what the problems were for the surgeons, where sponges were used and how, what they looked like at the end. In other words they gave us information that we needed to understand as lay persons what had happened medically. Four surgeons said that they would have closed this patient up under the very same circumstances. Four surgeons explained why doctors are not able to count sponges or instruments while they are working. They clearly explained why surgeries are set up to have the head nurse and the head tech carefully count. That is their job. We learned from a plaintiff videotaped evidence that the nurse in the case admits she doesn't always watch the count.

In the end when we were in the jury room deliberating it came down to the law. By definition was the doctor guilty of malpractice? None of us could say he was. It was clear from the start that the fault lay with the nurse who gave the doctor the wrong information. He could only work with the knowledge he had. He had searched to try and find everything, he searched twice to make sure the opening was clear of foreign objects. We couldn't fault him for not acting on something he knew nothing about. He was told everything was accounted for.

The judge told us afterwards he was surprised by our decision. He felt that an all lady jury would be swayed by a pure appeal to our emotions. At the end of the day he was impressed with us. Did we feel sorry for the lady? Of course we did, she had gone through hell. The case had to be decided on the facts though and that is where her lawyer failed her. He could not prove that the doctor had committed malpractice. It was clear where the error lay and the hospital had admitted they were at fault and settled with the woman. She clearly should have gone after the hospital for more money then she did. Her lawyer should have remembered that women have brains in addition to hearts.

Was justice served today? I don't think anybody came out a winner today. Sometimes when it rains the sky is crying.

Judgement

I have a summons for jury duty today. I don't know if I will be picked for a jury or not but I'm ready to serve if they need me. I know a lot of people feel that being called to jury duty is a major inconvenience however I would quite like to be on a jury.

The right to a fair trial should be given to everyone and the person is innocent until proven guilty. How often did we hear that in school? In reality however we can clearly see that for many that is not true. People are tried in the press and by their fellow citizens all the time. If you look at any celebrity trial, Michael Jackson for example, people have a field day deciding the person is guilty and trying to dig up information that "proves" their case.

In our daily lives were are quick to judge a person, even if he is a perfect stranger, based on our own prejudices. He looks like a crook, those types are always shifty, all of their kind are lazy good for nothings, etc. The Bible says "judge not lest ye be judged" but that doesn't stop us from passing judgment onto others.

When I was in high school I was on our school's champion debate team. We always had to be able to debate both sides in our inter school meets. It has taught me to look at things logically and see if a case is really proved or not. I look at the facts displayed in court during a trial not what the press or anyone else says.

If picked I know I will listen carefully to both sides and one of them better have a good solid case for either guilt or innocence if they want my vote. I need proof not supposition. Bring on the facts.

 

Interesting Quote

My Oriental Wisdom calendar has a great quote by Buddha for today which says "Overcome anger by love, evil by good, the greedy by generosity, and the liar by truth." It is a powerful concept using the power of good to overcome the power of evil. Father Andrew Greeley recently wrote an article on the encyclical "God is Love" that Pope Benedict just issued. You can find Father Greeley's review here http://www.suntimes.com/output/greeley/cst-edt-greel03.html. Tony Hillerman in his Navaho mysteries brings to life the Native American belief in harmony and keeping on the true path towards yourself, your neighbors, and the earth.

I believe it is no coincidence that religions as different as the three above all have harmony and love as their central core. When I was in an art class at college we did drawings from a live model. The model was in the center and the artists were ranged around the model with their easels and even though we were drawing the same model all the drawings were different because we were all seeing her from a different perspective and through our own artistic abilities. It came to me that God would be like that model. No one religion can capture the totality that is God because we are all seeing him/her from a different perspective and through our own way of analyzing life. Certain characteristics however cross all religions and the common truth that God is love comes from many sources because we are seeing the same thing.

I have a strong need for harmony in my life. I do not like strife and six years of a disharmonious marriage has made me determined to ensure that my life will never be in that kind of upheaval again. I am a person who at heart is a peacemaker. If there is strife I try and calm the waters. I had one person who accused me on a public newsgroup of being naive because I urged an end of a viscous battle between two people and that the combatants forgive and stop disruption of the newsgroup. So be it. If urging the end of evil is naive then I'm naive but in my heart I feel I am doing God's will when I try to help and make peace.

Violence begets violence and hatred begets hatred. The only way to overcome and stop the strife is to try and show others the power of good. We must find a way to help those in need and help them to a better life for themselves and their families. Poverty is one of the biggest recruiting agents for hatred. When you have nothing and you see people who have plenty ignoring your plight it is easy to slip into that despair that allows hatred to enter your heart. I know a lot of people are cynical when they see stars on telethons and out in poor countries with UNICEF and other agencies trying to help. It is easy to think that they are just in it for the publicity but if that publicity brings the plight of the poor to the attention of the world and gets people involved in helping then that publicity is a good thing. People like Bono, Angelina Jolie, George Clooney, etc. have by their very public profiles been able to focus the attention of governments and ordinary citizens on the problems of the world and have showed us how we can help.

Love, what a concept. The picture is called "Full Circle". If we start with God is love and use that knowledge to help our fellow beings to a better life and a peaceful world then we will come back to that fullness that is God in our lives.

 

 

Happy

I was thrilled with U2 picking up 5 Grammy awards last night. They are one of my favorite groups with their "Joshua Tree" being one of my most played CDs. Their album of the year "How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb" is their best album since "Joshua Tree." I like not only their music but the fact that they aren't ashamed to admit that they are Christians. There are a lot of religious references in their music. I admire artists that are not afraid to speak up and say that they believe in God. It is so easy to be cynical and deny a higher power. When artists such as U2 or Richard Gere, who is a practicing Buddhist, stand up and admit that they follow a religion it gives a good example to young people that there is no shame in being religious.

I have always been convinced that there is a loving God that looks over us. I have learned from my religious beliefs that we are put here on this earth to help others. My God is a loving God and I want to make sure that I live my life in a way that says thank you for the gift of life s/he has given me. My life hasn't always been easy but I have always felt God's love in my life and I knew that s/he would get me through the rough spots because s/he loves me. I feel sorry for people who do not have that comfort because they have abandoned God. Fortunately God does not abandon us. I have known die-hard atheists who have eventually come back to the God of their childhood.

The other thing that has made me happy is a new picture that came to me last night. I set it to render before I went to bed but the picture wasn't finished by the time I left for work. I came home to the completed picture tonight and was blown away. I am calling it "Call of the Wild." One of the things I am most thankful for is that God has given me my artistic talent. I love sharing my art work with other people.

 

New Job

It is no secret that I moved back in with my mother to help take care of her a little over a year ago. She has come to depend on me for a lot of things and I don't regret for a single moment helping her out. I am the only girl among four boys and there are some things that she needs to be able to talk to a woman about.

Mom surprised me yesterday when she told me I needed to be firm with one of my younger brothers since he wasn't listening to her. She has also urged me to be firm with my older brother. Neither one of them are very responsible and they are one of the reasons she is still working because they are always on her for hand outs. This is quite a reversal for her because she always wanted there to be harmony in the household and has always before urged me to keep quiet. I guess she figures now that maybe I can accomplish what she hasn't been able to do and get the two boys to grow up and take responsibility for their own lives.

I think I'm going to deputize my other two brothers as helpers in trying to get my charges behaving in a manner conducive to getting Mom to retire. After all one brother has a second degree black belt in the same discipline as Chuck Norris. Hmmm I wonder if Chuck might be free to kick some rear ends for me. ;-)

 

Wealth

I have a daily calendar that has quotes from Eastern Philosophy on it. Today’s quote is from Mahatma Gandhi and says, “Increase of material comforts, it may be generally laid down, does not in any way whatsoever conduce to moral growth.” For me this goes with the old proverb “wealth can’t buy happiness.” One of my favorite quotes is from The Little Prince and says “what is essential is invisible to the eye.

 

I believe that the important things in life can not be purchased. I was married to a man who felt he had to buy things all the time. He always needed the newest, the biggest, the best in material goods. He thought if he bought me something, usually something he wanted, that it would absolve him from giving me what I really needed which was love and respect. In the end he was left with all the material possessions because I didn’t want them.

 

For me the important things in life can not be purchased. My love does not have a price. I give it freely and willing to those I want to give it to. You can not buy it from me. The same goes for respect. You earn my respect by your words and actions. I can not be bribed with material goods to give you respect. It doesn’t work that way.

 

I am satisfied with older electronic equipment and as long as it works I’m happy. Most of my furniture is second hand or older stuff I’ve had for years but it is still serviceable so why replace it. A majority of my wardrobe was given to me by friends when the dress code changed where I worked and I couldn’t afford a new wardrobe. I don’t need a lot of material things.

 

I think people need many things that can not be purchased. People need friendship. People need love. People need understanding. People need someone to listen to them. None of these things can be purchased. These are the essentials of life and can not purchased at a store. You can not flip through a catalog and order them. What is essential lives in the heart. Love, understanding, kindness, goodness these are essential things that need to be developed in a person for that person to live a happy life. How can a person be happy with only material things? How can a person be happy if there is no love or caring in his life?

 

If you really want to give something special to someone give the gift of yourself. Give up a little of your time to help someone else. That type of gift is wealth beyond measure.

 

The picture is from my short story “Pot of Gold" found at

http://members.aol.com/michelesstorys/gold.htm/ which will give you an idea what some creatures will do for money.

 

Attitude

How often have you heard it is all a matter of attitude? Or he has such a sour attitude? Or she has such a positive attitude? Or that person really needs an attitude adjustment.  It’s all about the attitude. If you look at winners you see that they have an “attitude.” If you look at losers you see “attitude.” We all have attitudes as we go through life and our attitudes can change from situation to situation.

 

Generally I have an upbeat attitude towards life. It has always been easier to see a glass as half full then half empty. These last two weeks have really pushed my ability to be upbeat with acute bronchitis followed immediately by severe stomach flu. Finally however I am starting to feel better and things are looking up. That is subject to change however when I get to work on Monday and see how much work has been piled up on my desk while I was out sick. My attitude towards work has changed in the last year. I have come to realize that it is impossible to get ahead the way the job is structured and basically my attitude is that I will do what I can do to the best of my ability and not worry about the rest. I didn’t structure the job the way it is set up and the only thing I can do is my best. Attitude.

 

I find myself doing “attitude adjustments” at times. If I find I am getting upset at something I force myself to mentally step away and look at what is going on and analyze why I am getting upset. Is there something I am doing that causes the problem? Is there something that could be changed to make it easier? Is it something that is out of my hands completely? The most important thing is am I beating myself up because of this? I believe that our attitude towards life should be that we are important as individuals and we need to make our lives as smooth running for ourselves as possible. We have a tendency to beat ourselves up and we need to stop it. Yes we make mistakes but that is part of being human. Learn from the mistakes and move on. We are our own worse critics.

 

I do not like having to deal with people who have a sour attitude towards life. Doom and gloom. I was in a marriage for six years with a man who always looked for the worst in everything except himself. I would much rather be happy then miserable. If you look for only the bad in life you will find it. If you look at the bad in life as a challenge to make things better then a negative becomes a positive. When life hands you lemons make lemonade. That is what my grandpa always said.

 

I have a cat with a real attitude. At 7:30 this morning it was “I don’t care if Mommy is sleeping I want to play with my pink fuzzy face toy.” Boom, bang, crash, run, pounce, jump, roll. Sigh. Turn up the ocean sound on the sleep machine and roll over. Merlin has a short attention span and will stop shortly. A matter of attitude.

 

Listening

When I saw my doctor on Wednesday I was a little put out when he told me I couldn't go back to work until Monday at the earliest. I was going to try and go back on Thursday even though to be honest it would have been pushing it. The doctor not only preempted my asking to go back early but made sure I had to listen by writing a note that said I couldn't be back at work until 02/06/06. I hate to admit it but he was right. There was no way I would have been able to work. Sometimes like it or not we have to listen and do as we are told. I know I am an extremely stubborn person and I will push myself beyond my endurance unless I am stopped.

We have snow coming in and the beach sounded real nice to me. I am a huge Dr. Who fan and can hardly wait until the new series is finally shown here in the States. My English friends have been talking about it for a year. The picture is called "At the Beach" and is a salute to warmer weather and one of my favorite series.

No Fun

I have been battling the stomach flu since last Friday. I ended up in the Emergency Room Monday night because I needed something to stop me from throwing up constantly. I saw my regular doctor today who refuses to let me go back to work until next Monday at the earliest. This has not been fun at all. I am sick of flat soda and crackers but I can't eat anything with any flavor to it because my stomach doesn't want to keep it down. Hopefully the new medicine will help and I can soon be back doing something more fun then lying in bed. I might even be able to write something here that would be worth reading. ;-)

The picture is called "The Dark Lands" and was done for my short story series but it does show how my gastrointestinal tract feels.