This is the Day

My older brother asked me if I was supremely confident about today's surgery. Uh no. I'm scared half to death. Remember when I was on the jury duty a couple of years ago. The suit was against one of the doctors at this hospital. It was clear he was not at fault but the surgery nurse was. I'm confident in my doctor however I'm nervous about the staff that she has. I will be glad when it is all over.

Right now I have messages from all over the United States letting me know prayers are being said. I know that the Hospital Chaplain will be there with me and that our Parrish Priest will try and be there. My mother is planning on staying the entire day at the hospital. She is working this evening. My brother is working today so he will be in and out and probably some of my coworkers.

I've spent the last couple of days distracting myself with Doctor Who. I watched the Cybermen two parter last night. I really like this incarnation of the Doctor. There is no moral ambiguity about him. You know where he stands and you know he can't be corrupted. He is a Doctor who cares deeply.

The picture is called Into the Void. I'll write again after I get out of the hospital and feel well enough to sit up.

The real counter is 6302.

The Day Before

"We gain our freedom when we realize our most true nature." Rabindranath Tagore

Today is National Chocolate Day. I think it is about time they celebrated one of the major food groups. I remember my niece when she was around 15 or so told me she knew what the five major food groups were chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, and pizza. Smart girl! I love chocolate especially dark chocolate mixed with either orange or raspberry. A lot of my dessert recipes feature chocolate and the secret ingredient in my chili recipe is cocoa powder. The recipe is below in case you feel like making a batch now that the cooler weather is here.

I spent yesterday cleaning the upstairs including the disaster area we call the bathroom I share with my older brother. I figured it had to be done before I have surgery. I didn't relish the thought of using a bathroom that was that dirty and had that much mold with open wounds that could get infected. I am really sore today since I had to get on my hands and knees and scrub that floor to get off all the powder and hairspray.

Today I plan on doing my shopping at Wal-Mart, doing my pre-op prep, packing for tomorrow, and vegging out watching Doctor Who videos. I watched some last night and plan to watch a whole bunch more today. I am nervous about tomorrow so plan on distracting myself as much as possible to avoid thinking about it. With the number of people praying for me I'm sure every thing will go alright but I'll still be glad when it is all over.

Out of This World Chili

Recipe By     :Michele Wilson
Serving Size  : 8     Preparation Time :0:15
Categories    : Meat: Beef

Amount  Measure       Ingredient -- Preparation Method
--------     ------------        --------------------------------
2           pounds         beef stew meat, R-T-C -- cubed
29         ounces         no salt added stewed tomatoes -- drained and diced
31         ounces         low sodium kidney beans, canned -- drained
4           ounces         green chilies -- drained and diced
8           ounces         no salt added tomato sauce
1           cup              red wine
1           large            onion -- finely chopped
6           large            garlic cloves -- minced
1           large            green bell pepper -- seeded and diced
1           teaspoon      salt
1           teaspoon      paprika
1/4        teaspoon      freshly ground black pepper
2           teaspoons    ground cumin
4           tablespoons  chili powder
1/4        teaspoon       crushed red pepper
1/2        teaspoon       Tabasco sauce
2           tablespoons   cocoa powder
2           teaspoons     dried oregano
2           tablespoons    low sodium Worcestershire sauce
1           tablespoon      olive oil
2           ounces           four-cheese Mexican-style shredded cheese

Heat olive oil in a large pot or Dutch oven on medium-high heat. Add meat, onion, garlic and green pepper. Cook until meat is browned on all sides and vegetables are softened. Drain.

Add rest of ingredients except kidney beans and cheese. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat. Cover and simmer for two hours stirring every fifteen minutes.

Add kidney beans. Uncover and simmer for two more hours, again stirring every 15 minutes.

Serve with cheese sprinkled over top.

Description:   "Slow cooking for a long time makes this one of the best chilies you will ever taste!"
Source:   "Healthy Food That Tastes So Good!"
Copyright: "Michele Wilson © 2003"
Start to Finish Time:   "2:30"                                

Per Serving : 431 Calories; 14g Fat (29.0% calories from fat); 39g Protein; 35g Carbohydrate; 11g Dietary Fiber; 78mg Cholesterol; 470mg Sodium.  Exchanges: 1 1/2 Grain(Starch); 4 Lean Meat; 2 1/2 Vegetable; 1/2 Fat; 0 Other Carbohydrates.

The real counter is 6297

Reading

One of my greatest pleasures in life is curling up with a good book. I love to read. Sometimes I curl up with a cookbook and combine two of my favorite things, reading and cooking. In fact I got a new cookbook today that I will be curling up with tonight. I'm trying to decide which books to take to the hospital with me in case I'm there for a couple of days.

I had a very vivid dream last night that reminded me of one of my favorite books, Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451. I often dream in stories and this dream was no different. In the dream I had a library with thousands of books in it. The society where I was living however banned books. I was able to keep the books hidden using magic and there were places where I could actually sell some of the books and get them to people who still wanted to read.

When I lived in Denver I worked at the Tattered Cover Bookstore and to this day it is one of my favorite jobs. I loved working so closely with books. I remember the orientation with the lady who owns the store and she was talking about censorship. Her philosophy was that all books should be available to people. It was one of the reasons why you would find everything from extreme right wing to extreme left wing political books in her store.

One of the things that has always bothered me is the people who try and censor everything a child reads using prejudice as the basis for their reasoning. Their are people who do not understand fantasy and want to ban all books in that genre like the Harry Potter books. They automatically assume that anything that deals with magic has to be evil. In fact the word evil is one of their most over used words.

If a child's mind is to grow and flourish it has to be stimulated and one of the best ways of doing that is through reading.  Many of our top scientists today grew up on science fiction and fantasy. One of my largest group of art buyers is from NASA/JPL. Their minds were opened up to new and wondrous sights through words and they have taken that wonder and turned it into a fulfilling career.

I am aware that parents need to protect their children from pornography and they should be careful with what their children read however they should also be cognizant of their own prejudices and try and make sure that they aren't condemning good books that should be read. I'm sure J.K. Rowling's revelation that one of her main characters was gay will bring a renewed outburst from homophobes wanting to ban those books from libraries. It is time to stop and realize that their are gays in this world and that they are not monsters. They are human beings just like you and I. They, like us, were made in God's image. Remember Christ said "love thy neighbor as thyself." He didn't qualify that statement so that means everyone is your neighbor.

The picture is called Reading.

The real counter is 6292

Waiting

The Doctor who is doing the surgery on Monday called last night to see how I was doing and if I had any questions. I was really surprised. Mom was too. She couldn't remember another Doctor who did that. I was really touched that she would take time out of her busy schedule to check on a patient. You don't see that type of concern and care any more.

I discovered yesterday that I can't take the stomach medicine that was supposed to heal the stomach lesions. I'm allergic to it and throw up. I had to come home from work yesterday because of it. I'm still queasy this morning but hopefully my stomach will settle down. I have a lot to do before I can leave tomorrow afternoon. I have to have things caught up as much as possible.

I'm starting to feel a bit anxious about the surgery and will be glad when it is all over with. In the meantime I am doing art work to distract myself. The picture is called Docking Bay.

The real counter is 6282

Gone Phishing

A few months ago there was an article in the local paper about a woman who lost thousands of dollars because she believed the email from "EBay" asking her for account information. I was reminded about that story this morning when I received two emails that said they were from AOL asking me to update my information. Of course I immediately knew that they were phony. I receive emails every few days from “EBay” and “PayPal” about a non existent account that they want me to update. It is one of the biggest rackets around and their are so many gullible people who believe them and give out confidential information. No reputable place would ask for that kind of information via email. I always forwarded these types of emails onto AOL to let them know that there are "phishers" out there.

My Mom was a little puzzled last night after Heroes when I told her that the hospital better have NBC on their TV sets next Monday. Granted I am going to be recovering from surgery but I still want to watch my show. It is getting very interesting. Next week looks fantastic and I want to see it.

I was playing around with my computer the other night and came up with this picture. I'm calling it End of Day.

The real counter is 6276.

Tired

I'm not sure why they give you an amnesia drug before surgery but it sure is a weird experience. Sometimes I think maybe it would be helpful in life if we had that available. They warned us about the effect. I remember being wheeled into surgery, the spray they put in my throat to numb it (think banana flavored habanera, truly yuck), them putting this hard plastic thing in my mouth so they could get the probe down my stomach, them leaning over and putting something in the IV, eating toast in the recovery room, and waking up in my own bed late in the afternoon. Weird!

I had been telling the doctor's for years there was something wrong with the left side of my stomach and all they have done is throw acid reflux medicine down it. The probe showed several large, deep, ugly red lesions that the Doctor says weren't cancerous but if not treated they could go into cancer. Great one more thing to be concerned about.

I spent yesterday evening watching Doctor Who videos. After finding out the results I was naturally upset. I wonder why Doctors don't listen to their patients? What part of "I'm having a lot of pain here on the left side of my stomach" don't they understand? To add to the frustration I got to work this morning to find out they hadn't done the adjustments from yesterday leaving them for me to do today. Grrrrr!!!!!

This weekend I'm just going to totally relax. The picture is called Autumn Leaves.

The real counter is 6253.

Wild Wednesday

"The desire for enlightenment must be transformed into enlightenment." Koji

We have some thunderstorms coming in tonight. That means freaked out kitties in my bed. I don't know why Merlin and Pixie think that I can control the weather. As far as I know that isn't in my contract but then I haven't read the kitty contract very closely. They may have snuck all sorts of things in there.

I have the stomach scope tomorrow so I'll be off of work for one day. I got everything caught up at work today but I know come Friday it will be back logged again. My partner got back from her Mexico cruise today and she looks rested. She brought me back a real pretty blue stone pendant that I need to find a chain for.

I have been trying to get caught up on everything at home as well as at work. I have been paying ahead on the bills so I don't have to deal with them for a while. I'm hoping I don't have to be off of work for too long.

I have really been enjoying the Doctor Who videos that I bought and am looking forward to getting the next season when it comes out. I already have it preordered for shipment the beginning of November. Hey if you are going to be stuck at home with nothing good on TV you might as well watch something you enjoy. Speaking of which Heroes is getting interesting. They should be bringing together some of the storylines starting next week. Of course week after next I'll be in the hospital but hopefully the hospital TV will have NBC so I can watch it.

The new computer continues to work okay for now. I don't know what its problem was earlier in the week. Just temperamental I guess. I finished this picture the other night. It is called At the Pond.

The real counter is 6244.

Autumn

"There is one God and He is the enemy of no one." Nanak

Autumn has to be one of my favorite seasons of the year. The weather cools down from the heat of Summer yet it is still pleasant out. The colors here in the Midwest are so spectacular. The reds, oranges, golds and yellows of the leaves make a beautiful vista to see. The fall flowers are starting to bloom adding their colors to the mix. Autumn is God being an artist.

The new computer is continuing to work okay. My brother suggested that we get an exorcist for it. I'll tell you that thing is so temperamental I'm thinking of naming it after my ex. Maybe not it would probably refuse to work at all if I did that. ;-)

I saw my Doctor today as he needs to give the formal okay for the surgery. I have all the precerts needed for the two procedures. The closer we get the calmer I become and the more agitated my mother becomes. She is really scared about the whole thing. Me I just want to get it over with.

I really loves today's quote. I have always had a problem with anyone trying to put God into a war. Man is the one who wants to conquer and kill and they should do it in their own name and not try and blame it on God. God is the creator not the destroyer.

I finished this picture last night. I'm calling it Autumn Day.

The real counter is 6231.

Go Figure

God does have a sense of humor. Why else would he permit computers to have been invented? Remember the new computer that was acting up so bad the other day? I spoke to my brother who created the beast and we decided I probably would need to take the monster to our local computer repair shop. I came home and after the beast being off for three or four hours turned it on to double check something inside of it and it came on and has stayed on without any problems ever since. Sigh! I hate computers sometimes!

I got a notification the other day that my insurance has decided that yes the surgery is necessary and wow I can stay one whole day in the hospital after surgery. Mom is freaking saying there is no way I'm should be going home after one day but gee the thought of that hospital's food for more then one day is enough to guarantee that I'll make a real quick recovery. ;-)

The weather is starting to cool although we may have a few more hot days before Fall really takes hold. The leaves are just starting to turn. It is really so beautiful in the Midwest when the leaves turn. It is one of my favorite times of the year. I am going to give the new computer an acid test and try and do a Fall picture.

In the meantime the Guardian of the Present is being summoned to try and intimidate the computer into behaving itself.

The real counter is 6224

So-So Saturday

"I love friends. I want more friends. I love smiles. That is a fact. How to develop smiles? There are a variety of smiles. Some smiles are sarcastic. Some smiles are artificial - diplomatic smiles. These smiles do not produce satisfaction, but rather fear or suspicion. But a genuine smile gives us hope, freshness." Dalai Lama

One of my favorite smiles is David Tennant's smile. He is the current actor playing Doctor Who and he has a grin that lights up the screen. I received my Season Two package the other day which is where he takes over the character and I was watching it last night. I have Season Three on pre-order and it will be released on November 6. I can hardly wait. I will at least have something fun to watch while I recuperate from the surgery.

My new computer is being a real pain and we aren't quite sure what is going on but it may be the power supply. All I know is that it has suddenly managed to turn itself off from active mode and I have to keep restarting it. My brother thinks it may be the power supply. Sigh.

Fortunately I have everything backed up on good old Marvin who has been my work horse computer for years now. I can do my calendar on it and all of the art work I've done on the new computer is on here as well. Sometimes it pays to go with your gut instincts and do as I did and keep both computers up and running. Originally we thought of just retiring this computer but something told me not to. It is a good thing because it looks like I'll have to do some major work to get the other one up and running properly.

My picture for June on the calendar is going to be one of my favorites Magic Garden.

The real counter is 6221.

Tuesday Time

"The diamond cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials." Confucius

Normally I'm not a big fan of Confucius but I like today's quote. I should be glowing by the time every thing is finished health wise.

They moved my surgery up a couple of weeks to October 29th. I'll be glad to have everything over and done with. I think I'll go ahead and order the second set of Doctor Who videos that will be released the first week of November so I can have something to watch while

recuperating. If you are going to veg-out on Who you should do it with the best. Over the weekend I watched my tape of the Tom Baker episode The Deadly Assassin. I got to meet and work with Tom Baker a few years ago. He is a lovely man who really appreciates his fans.

I caught Heroes last night and it keeps getting better. They have some really unexpected things going on like Sylar losing his powers and being stuck in the middle of nowhere. I like Clair's new boyfriend but there is going to be conflict there with her Dad if he survives. It doesn't look good with that picture Suresh found. Heroes is one of the two shows I'll be watching for a while along with Stargate Atlantis. The only problem there is that it isn't on until 10 PM and I'm not really fond of the two shows that Sci-Fi has on before then. Unfortunately it will be a while before they get the next season of Doctor Who.

I'm hoping that one of my websites will get the wacky holidays for 2007 up soon so that I can get the calendar for next year finished. I am hoping to work on it while I am out after surgery. The May picture will be Memorial Day.

The real counter is 6208.

Sunday Sillies

Pixie has what Mom calls the Sunday Sillies. She is racing around like crazy and turning flips in the air and generally behaving like a loon. It is a fun way to start the day.

Okay geek time. The Doctor Who season finale was very interesting. Great acting jobs all around. That being said I do wish Russell Davies would stop writing scenes with the Doctor in tears. Come on now. Yes David Tennant is a brilliant actor and does the anguish and tears very well but I am tired of the soggy Doctor. He started off the season in tears after Rose left, went all soggy on us in "Family of Blood" because he wanted to stay human and with the human he had fallen in love with, and ends the season in tears because he is alone again. Enough already. David Tennant has too great of a grin to have him all soggy.

I went ahead and ordered Season Two of Doctor Who that starts with David Tennant taking over the role. I thought about getting Season One but decided I just didn't like Christopher Eccelstone well enough to pay that kind of money. When Season Three comes out next month I'll get it, soggy Doctor and all. ;-)

Stargate Atlantis was another good episode. I'm glad to see Shepherd acting like a real leader for a change. Losing Weir to the Replicators does leave it open for her to come back in future storylines. I always found her to be rather an boring character and think Samantha Carter is a better choice to head Atlantis. Now if they could just ship the highly irritating McKay off somewhere I would be happy.

I had an idea for a picture the other day and am really pleased with how it came out. I have always loved the Tiffany style glass lamps and have a beautiful one in storage with red roses. I decided to do a picture of a garden and use all glass textures. Fifteen hours rendering time on the new machine and a million and a half pixels later I came up with this picture. I am calling it Tiffany Garden.

The real counter is 6191.

Rough Day

It was a rough day today. They did an ultrasound yesterday and my Doctor got the results today. They weren't good. There are a large amount of fibroid tumors in the uterus and there is a massive one on the right side which has been causing all the pain. The upshot is that they will have to do a complete hysterectomy on November 12th. In addition they have a scope scheduled October 18th for the esophagus and stomach to check out the large hiatal hernia. To say I'm upset is an understatement.

The good thing today was the reaction of the hospital's chaplain who is one of the nicest people in the world. He gave me a big hug and told me to keep him informed as he would be there when I had the surgery. That means my Mom will have someone with her which will be nice. That hug meant a lot to me and made me feel better. So I'll have Chaplain Steve's prayers as well as a Franciscan Priest friend of my Mom's saying a Mass for me on the day of the surgery.

In the meantime I'll just keep popping those pain pills. I'll blame any of the weird posts on those. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.  ;-)

The picture for April on my calendar will be Waterfall.

The real counter is 6180.

Totally Tuseday

As you may recall I got hooked on Heroes last season and have watched the first two episodes of Season Two. This show is absolutely fascinating and I am really curious as to where they are going with the stories. So far we have found out that Peter survived the absorption of the nuclear energy, Matt has finally become a real policeman, Suresh is working to bring down the company, the Haitian survived, and Claire has a boyfriend who can fly. Okay it is a fantasy show just deal with it.

What I like about the show is you have ordinary people who have extraordinary powers and they have to deal with them. My favorite is still Hiro and watching him trying to make a hero in feudal Japan out of a drunken Englishman is a real scream. The fact that the actor, Masai Oka, is a real geek just makes him that more appealing.

The other show I watched Friday was Stargate Atlantis which looks like they are going to be having an interesting season also. It was good to see Shepherd in a real leadership situation. Okay I admit it I think Joe Flannigan is really hot. ;-)

Doctor Who will be ending their season on this Friday. Hopefully the SciFi channel will pick up season three. I have been a big Doctor Who fan going back to when I first saw it years ago with Tom Baker. I have met and worked with many of the Who people over the years. They remain some of my favorite people.

I met with the doctor today about the hiatal hernia. He wants to do a scope of the area and that is scheduled for October 18th. We will then decide if we need to do surgery or not. The ultrasound is tomorrow and maybe we can find out what is causing all the pain. Slowly I'm getting back together.

My March picture for my calendar will be this year's St. Patrick's Day picture Irish Mist.

The real counter is 6171.